The Plague that is Inundating the United States.
The Plague that is Inundating the United States.

May 22, 2007

In every nook and cranny, the arts, the sciences, and of course politics. Having been plagued with ill health lately, I have found myself oftentimes in the uncomfortable clutches of modern medicine.  A dear friend of mine suggested I visit John Hopkins, and he would arrange an appointment.  Several days later, some good woman called me from John Hopkins and wanted to schedule an appointment.  I asked what it was for, and she said, “a mammogram.” So I asked her who she was calling for and she stated, “Carl Marcus.”

I would suspect that a discerning person would detect audibly that she was speaking to a man, and probably not a woman named Carl.  I asked her to have her supervisor call me back, and she asked why.  I told her that I lost confidence in her.  No one ever called me back.  That is a problem today.  Nobody calls back.  Recently, I had an appointment with a neurologist who was running a pain clinic.  He put me on a 14 day regiment of drugs, and much to my dismay, he didn’t order enough medication for the 14 days.  So, of course I called him.  I made 3 calls, and then I started getting an answering machine (usually the kiss of death), that stated if I need a refill on prescriptions to push 2, which I did.  I never heard a word from him. 

My next visit, I mentioned to him that it was rude, crude, and thoughtless to not return a message.  It seems that in the 3rd or 4th time I was calling, that I may have said, “Why do you have this answering machine if you do not return calls?”  He brought that up at our next visit.  He wanted to make me aware that he was a Yale graduate. Of course I was tempted to say, “Did not Yale ever make a point to not return messages?”  I have had it with these creed professionals, doctors, lawyers, or other top echelon people who do not return phone messages.   I am going to threaten their malfeasance with exposure on the web.  So if we can not flog them, we can at least flagellate them in print. 

I will tell you something that happened recently with a reporter from the Wall Street Journal whose name as soon as I learn it, will not hesitate to besmirch. Being the hardened Jewish man that I am, I have been plagued for years with a charitable streak, hence every week; I am always looking for something good to do for somebody. I got lucky the other day. I came across a dear woman pictured on a full spread on the Wall Street Journal. She was in her 60's, dead broke, she had been banking all of her social security checks, and when her husband passed on, a sleaze bag was able to tag her account and leave her dead broke. I thought that this was my chance. I called the reporter whose name I can not remember. The old lady was in Birmingham Alabama. I asked the reporter for her address so I could send her money. I told her that I am not a crack pot, and I advertise in the paper all the time. All I wanted was to get some money to this person, and asked her how I could go about doing that. I never heard from the reporter again. Is this person worth flogging? You bet! I am going to send this paragraph to the Wall Street Journal and see what they can do.

My recommendation is to not take this kind of crap with them. If an attorney does not return a call, tell him to not call me again.  That is an indication that he is useless.  Other then finding this brief blog humorous, my opinion is to take heed. Answer the phone messages, emails, and people will think better of you. It is a sign of a first class human who does that. Here at Capetown, if anybody promises you that he will call you back, let me know if they do not, so I can start castigation proceedings against them.  I thank you kind reader for your attention.  I wish you good health, fortune, and the time to enjoy it and the time to go shopping.

Carl Marcus
Chairman & CEO

Addition *1/30/08*

In regards Capetown Diamond not slipping into morass of crap, I have issued some edicts that the employees must adhere to.  All calls must be returned under pain of death (or a good right hook to the chest).  None of my employees are allowed to say no.  This retort is usually relegated to some stupidly ill trained geek who hasn’t the slightest clue as to what you are talking about.  It is just much simpler for them to say no; much like in Asia where they always say yes, because they don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. Help me feed my sadistic tendencies.  If you leave a message for any one here, and are not called back, please retain the name of the messenger. I will send you full details of their punishment. 

To fight back with this mindless treatment, try not to deal with anyone who has an answering machine.  I might add, in defense of our answering machine, it is more of an informational source then a place to leave a message. After spending a few grand, I find that I do not have enough cyber experience to change our system to even take a message.  Hopefully that will change fast.